I Didn't Fall, I Was Pushed: Triumphant Recovery From Clergy Sex Abuse

I Didn't Fall, I Was Pushed: Triumphant Recovery from Clergy Sex Abuse traces the faith journey of a five-year-old girl raped repeatedly by her father's Spiritual Director, a Catholic priest.The survivor, now a Psychiatrist, details the loss of her faith and the painstaking rebuilding of that faith over the decades that followed.The book is set at a Benedictine monastery in New Mexico where the author spent four weeks studying Spiritual Direction. The gentle verbs and repetition in her account echo the quiet and predictability of the monastery. This reliable stillness, so different from the commotion of "real life," formed a stable platform for her healing and growth. The story of losing and regaining her faith is deftly woven into her account of life and study at the monastery.Many survivors of clergy sex abuse lose their faith. In this tale of courage and healing the author shares her experience, strength and hope to encourage other survivors of clergy sex abuse who wish to regain their faith.An epilog is set in a clinic in downtown Dallas where the author served homeless, mentally-ill persons for six years. Working with murderers, rapists, burglars, prostitutes and those convicted of aggravated assault tested every principle the author learned at the monastery.ACCLAIM FOR I DID'NT FALL, I WAS PUSHEDThis book is a story only a wounded healer can tell. It is a story of redemption and a healing journey that navigates religious identity and spiritual redemption. Dr. Delaney gives readers insight into the layers of healing that survivors of clergy abuse face along the path to transformation and advocacy for others.Jaime J. Romo, Ed.D., author, Healing the Sexually Abused Heart: A Workbook for Survivors, Thrivers, and Supporters www.jaimeromo.comSusan's mindfulness brings epiphanies; she generously shares them with us in her book. Spiritual directors and pastoral counselors can learn from Susan's gentle insights. Nancy K. Dunkerley, Founding Director, Spiritual Ministries Institute. www.spiritualministriesinstitute.org Sexual violation is devastating to the body, to the emotions but also to the soul. The path to healing, which many never complete, is especially steep for the healing of the soul. Susan's gentle and insightful story of her own journey serves as an encouragement to anyone who struggles with the pain of spiritual loss. Thomas P. Doyle O.P., author, Sex, Priests and Secret CodesDoctor Delaney records her struggle and the process of becoming a healer as she herself was healed. The story is eloquently told and ironically set in a monastery-one of the church's traditional havens to confine abusers-and among the down-and-out homeless, mentally ill. Truly a triumph to lead other wounded persons to the path of healing. A. W. Richard Sipe, therapist, author, Sex, Priests and Power, www.richardsipe.com Susan has chronicled a very important part of her life. Her efforts to reconnect with her spirituality were challenging but successful. Those looking to reconnect with a "higher power" are encouraged to read this book. The real life story of one woman's journey to wholeness is very readable and inspiring. Father Bob Hoatson, Road to Recovery, www.road-to-recovery.org This spiritual memoir is about healing. It is a gift. Susan shares openly about the traumatic effects of being raped by a priest as a little girl. She gives a vivid and precise account of her path to recovery. You feel her hand stretched out, inviting you to find your path. I am grateful for this brave and open-hearted book.Anne Barrett Doyle, Co-Director, BishopAccountability.org, www.bishopaccountability.org Only when survivors like Susan find the courage to speak out will children be safe.Barb Dorris, SNAP Outreach director, www.snapnetwork.org