When We Were Idiots: Stories of Stupidity, Serendipity, and Something Like Maturity

Some names have been changed to protect the guilty. Others stayed the same because, frankly, they deserve the credit—or the blame. These stories are true, mostly. The memories are mine, filtered through time, laughter, and the occasional dramatic retelling. I didn’t grow up famous, tragic, or particularly brilliant. I was just a kid with a wrist rocket, some friends with too much energy, and parents who somehow let us survive childhood. Later, I became a husband, father, and eventually that guy who says, “Did I ever tell you about the time…?” This isn’t a memoir. These are snapshots—of growing up in Southern California, of falling in love with a girl way out of my league, of learning how to be a man without a manual. It’s the ridiculous things we did with bottle rockets and mortars, how a dragonfly nearly ended a teenage friendship, and how a misunderstanding about a baseball umpire named “Al” became one of my favorite inside jokes with the woman I married. You won’t find any great revelations here—just the kinds of stories that make you laugh out loud one minute and feel a little tug in your chest the next. If you’ve ever been young, or dumb, or in love, I think you’ll find something here that feels familiar. Pull up a chair. Let me tell you some stories.