You've Been Blocked: How and Why Gay Men Pursue the Perfect M-Ranking

A PROVOCATIVE DISCUSSION FOR AND ABOUT GAY MEN SEEKING EMPOWERMENT AND INTERNAL SATISFACTIONYou’ve Been Blocked provides gay men with validating analysis and strategies for prioritizing self-acceptance and empowering authentic relationships; it is a discussion and analysis about parts of the dynamics within the gay male community (GMC). Despite increased awareness, tolerance and improved legal equality, some gay men are still marginalized by their family, society and later, other gay men.When gay boys and teens are blocked from their true selves, deficient validation interferes with customary development. Parents and teachers, for example, typically presume or encourage most boys to be straight, even though a small number of them are gay. This fundamental blocking can persist into adulthood, challenging gay men to reprogram an erroneously learned need for external approval and people-pleasing.THE M-RANKING™ SEARCH FOR PERFECTIONThe repercussions of childhood blocking lead some adult gay men to partake in a superficial rating system that is applied to themselves and other gay men called the M-Ranking. Many gay men highly value masculinity, flawless visual aesthetics and “straight-acting” or "straight-passing" qualities. Pursuing the superficial values of the M-Ranking furthers the blocking effect, creating a counter-productive search for perfection that is not realistically obtainable by most gay men.